What Danica Patrick’s naked body says about America

pret8 As you all know, the Super Bowl was two days ago. I realize that not everyone in America is a football fan, but it is impossible to deny the cultural importance of this past weekend. The Super Bowl gives us a chance to eat hot wings and get buffalo sauce all over the place.

It gives us a chance to get rowdy and drink on a Sunday afternoon. We can pretend it’s still the 20th century and listen to Bruce Springsteen or a number of other aging rock stars entertain us at half time. But, perhaps most importantly, the Super Bowl delivers us some top notch commercials.

Or at least, it’s supposed to. As anyone who watched television last weekend will tell you, that was a weak crop of commercials. The audience was left disappointed in a variety of ways.

Some commercials were incredibly banal and stale. I’m looking at you GE.  I know you reused that pathetic wind energy commercial. Take your hippie propaganda elsewhere; I’m too busy blasting my heat in the wintertime to notice.

Other commercials were just too bizarre to be enjoyable. Apparently, Sobe Life Water was under the impression that I had a pair of 3D goggles handy. I do not.

Regardless of the quality of I believe that one can tell a lot of about the state of the American psyche by analyzing the commercials. I will attempt to explain how the GoDaddy.com commercial in which Danica Patrick is showering perfectly explains where America is psychologically.

Let us start by getting the obvious symbolism out of the way. Americans feel vulnerable right now. The economy is in such a state of flux that Americans feel very open and exposed. (I mean, they certainly have good reason to feel helpless. Lil’ Wayne has more bling around his neck than Fort Knox currently holds.) In the GoDaddy.com commercial, Danica Patrick is naked.

While they were ogling Danica in a towel, America was also sympathizing with her. Americans can identify with her feeling of helplessness. The drooling and arousal felt by Americans all across the country is our way of releasing our pent up anxiety about the economy.

Furthermore, the commercial is very voyeuristic. Three men are watching Danica Patrick and manipulating her into the shower. Similarly, I am sure that any American who has money invested in the stock market is looking around, anxiously awaiting someone (Ashton Kutcher preferably) to come running out and tell the U.S. that they’ve been punk’d and he was about to return 300 billion dollars to the American public. Bernie Madoff would be involved somehow, too.

Going into the Super Bowl, America was unsure about itself. Luckily for the nation, we were able to take comfort in the game and the commercials. Thank you, GoDaddy.com for allowing the nation to take solace in Danica Patrick’s naked body.

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4 Responses to “What Danica Patrick’s naked body says about America”


  1. 1 tigster66 February 3, 2009 at 6:01 am

    Peter- I’ve read some pretty good introductions in my lifetime, but let me say, this is probably the most compelling introduction I’ve ever seen.

  2. 2 Jay February 4, 2009 at 8:10 pm

    people walked in on me reading this post and thought i was looking at porn.

  3. 3 Nick Isasi February 7, 2009 at 4:10 pm

    haha, i completely agree!


  1. 1 Pretzel Day turns one month « Pretzel Day Trackback on February 28, 2009 at 10:54 pm

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