Thanks, Annoying People for ruining the word ‘epic’

Before I get started into the recent etymology of  the word epic, I would like to begin by greeting any Australian visitors this blog might have.

G’day! (I know, terribly cliche. I’m not happy I wrote that either.) My name is Peter. Any friend of Jay’s is a friend of mine. I’ve seen Crocodile Dundee, like, seven times. Furthermore, I’ve seen Crocodile Dundee 2 about five times. Crocodile Dundee 3, I only saw once. It wasn’t very good. I’m sorry. Please don’t tell Paul Hogan. On the other hand, I’m a huge fan of Colin Hay. Love it. Also, Scrubs which Jay says is huge over there.

We are not so different, American and Australia. We both begin with the letter A. We both were started by the Brits. We both have universal healthcare. (Almost) In conclusion, I hope you guys like Jay. But back to the topic at hand.

Epic is a very useful word. It can be substituted for awesome. It is used to describe something massive in magnitude or scope. It can really come in quite handy. I can call Homer’s The Odyssey as an epic tale. I could describe the Pyramids in Egypt as epic structures. Unfortunately, I can’t do that anymore. Bearded high school kids and douchey hipsters have hijacked the vernacular. Instead of being used to describe awesome things, it is now almost exclusively proceeded by “fail.” Often times the word is capitalized. (ie FAIL) Even more disturbingly, it is preceded by LOL. (ie LOL epic FAIL)People need to stop saying that. We get it, you’re alternative.

You cannot believe the number of times (at least 3) I have wanted to describe something as epic, but been forced to restrain myself in order to avoid being placed into that strata of “human beings.” Should I describe the 1812 Overture as epic? No, probably not. Because the people around me might assume I’m the type of person who says things like, “Face palm. LOL. Epic fail.” The day someone confuses me with one of them would literally be the worst day of my life.

Everyone who describes a “fail” as epic should be sequestered in the desert or an island the way people in The Bible did to lepers. Also, they should take the people make those pictures with “fail” as a caption with them. They are all terrible people who do not deserve to, in the words of Chamillionaire, get on my level.

And, again, I would like to extend a warm welcome to any new visitors Pretzel Day might have.


10 Responses to “Thanks, Annoying People for ruining the word ‘epic’”

  1. 1 Aaron Salley May 11, 2010 at 8:17 am

    what do you mean they’ve hijacked the vernacular? doesn’t vernacular mean “the native language of a country”? So yeah, maybe I looked it up, but only after I was pretty sure you didn’t use it correctly. They’ve hijacked our entire language by ruining the word epic(which i agree they ruined, which is why i was reading this post in the first place)? I might be a loser who not only took the time to right click and google vernacular, but to, worse, read this post and then write this comment, but that doesn’t mean you don’t suck too. Aren’t you guys writing majors or something? You should know words(imo). Oh and speaking of looking up words….
    it doesn’t mean awesome! Homer’s Odyssey wasn’t an epic tale, it was an epic. only one of the 6 offered definitions said you can use it to describe something “…heroic or impressive in quality,” and the only reason you can do that is because things like the Odyssey are so awesome, and they usually involve…impressive heroes.
    you suck. if you’re going to write an essay about a word then please look it up. and even though i wish you could suck less by looking up some words, you’ll probably still suck. am i using the word ‘suck’ too much? probably. but that doesn’t change anything about you and how much you suck

  2. 3 Dana July 27, 2010 at 9:24 am

    Hi Peter,
    It was good reading your post! That Aaron guy.. sucked. Bahaha, just thought I’d use his word, it’s a bit outdated Aaron, and childish so to speak. You should stay home and be a hermit if you’re going to try and bring people down like that.

    Anyway, I’m from Australia, so I had a giggle when I read the first part. Your “g’day” was appreciated, it’s funny, but sometimes I think that more non-australian people say that than australians. Because they think we say it and so they say it to say hey to us hahaha. I remember that in high school anyway, with all the exchange students. And when I went overseas, I had to say it everywhere in Asia just to please them all haha.

    Paul Hogan, could be my Grandpa. Well, he couldn’t really, not biologically, but in age he could. I have seen the first crocodile dundee film, when I was really young, not even a teenager yet. And it was with my Grandpa. Scrubs was massive overhere about 2 years ago, now it’s more twilight than anything else, that is something the tweens have picked up and adopted as they’re own culture, as well as the word epic, which I now hate.

    Most people here use it instead of saying “cool”, there are so many people that take it out of context and it annoys me so much. I tell people when they take it out of context that they’re making themselves seem extrememly stupid to those that actually know what it means, and conforming to a trend, therefore becoming a follower. It’s such a shame to see such a nice word go to waste.

    Regards, Dana.

  3. 4 shanek248 June 15, 2012 at 11:59 am

    It seems Im not the only one to find this annoying!

  4. 5 Passerby February 6, 2013 at 2:34 pm

    You’re definitely not alone.

    Sadly, now that companies and marketing firms have latched onto abusing the word as well, I think “epic” is our time’s new substitute for “cool.”

  5. 7 Jamie April 6, 2013 at 1:25 am

    I hate both words, “epic” and “fail” both have been ruined… I am 15, and I never ever follow the stupid stuff my awful generation does. I think the first time I heard this annoying word combination was in 6th grade, which was in the 2008 -2009 school year for me, I didn’t think much of it until towards the end of middle school and it got very annoying. I never really had much friends with people at school so I never bought into the dumb stuff people my age do. I am rather isolated and had only one friend who stopped being my friend to hang out with the popular jerks. However I never even heard the word epic used properly before, I didn’t even know it was a word until the dumb followers and obnoxious old hipsters started using that word combined with fail, and it is very annoying… And recently I saw a commercial involving quaker oats and the lady talking at the end says “today is going to be epic” it is horrid… I know things did not suck as bad 10 years ago, and things I’m sure were even better in the 90’s and before. I am sad that I was born too late to experience less stupid times.

  6. 9 ZIBZAB June 6, 2016 at 11:18 am


  1. 1 Epic. Saga unui adjectiv buclucaș | La colţu' străzii Trackback on August 1, 2011 at 10:41 pm

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